A very long engagement

"It's tooooo long!!!"
"Are you mad?!"
"You'll change your mind when you're actually in a relationship, trust me"

Those were the reactions I got when I shared over lunch with my colleagues that I will not contemplate marriage with anyone I've been with for less than 4 years.

No, it's not commitment phobia.

Just that since when has 4 years become too unreasonably long?!
Supposed we live till 80, 4 years isn't even a quarter or your life.
And that's too much time to take on a decision u'll have to live with possibly for the next 50 years?!

It's a little disturbing - not to mention scary - to realise that the behavior, views and expectations of many are now being dictated by what is perceived to be the general norm rather than what they are truly comfortable with. And it has come to the point where they are not only adopting it for themselves, they're actually convinced that that's the way to be. The right way to be.