Punk'd

2 hours I shd think, is enough to make anyone who isn’t hell-bent on seeking some form of justice to reconsider lodging a police report. Especially when it’s already past midnight, you’re tired from work and stuck at the station with some lady locked in a monetary dispute with her tenant, who just won’t stop gg on and on ’bout how “the stupid man will be begging and crying for mercy later” because “God has eyes”.

And for this memorable first experience, I owe it all to those damn punks who must have thought their lives too boring and so decidedly jumped on unsuspecting ’ole me yesterday afternoon while I strolled past on my way to the NDP rehearsals.
Maybe I looked harmless – I don’t know – but what baffled me and continues to baffle me was that it didn’t occur to them that a tripod as sturdy as the one I was carrying can actually do a lot of damage. And adding to that, even though I’m no expert in planning attacks, I’m inclined to think that the common walkway right outside the HSBC centre isn’t exactly the smartest choice of venue to carry out one. For a start, it’s just sitting beside one of the most utilized roads in Singapore. And furthermore, considering that it was only 4:45pm, what are the chances of not having someone encountering upon the scene en route to the bus-stop outside the Fullerton Hotel.

As such, I certainly didn’t see this coming. And it took me a while too before my mind cld processed what just happened. I mean, if I were at an alley in the middle of the night, yes I can see it happening. But absolutely not in such an open space under broad daylight.

Word for word, my statement reads:
“On the 30/06/2007 between 1630hrs to 1700hrs, I was walking along the pathway in front of HSBC building and I spotted a group of about 6-7 Male subjects (majority of them Malays) leaning against the wall in front of me. Most of them wore boots and wore tight jeans with leather jackets. They dressed like “punks” and two of them were bald-headed. They were about 18-25 years old and all of them were skinny build. I ignored them and carried on walking past them. After walking past them, two of the Male Malay subjects started to assault me from the back by fisting me. I turned around and the whole group of Male Malays were in front of me. During the assault, I started to swing the camera tripod stand in front of me to defend myself against the assailant. While doing so, another Male Malay among them who was holding onto a long hard object about 40cm charged towards me and started to hit me on my head with the object. I wished to state that I did not see clearly what was the object used. While the Male Malay was attacking me with the object, the other two assailants had fisted on me and tried to restrain me from swinging the tripod stand. I managed to break free and while the whole group was approaching me, I started shouting for help. The group then fled upon hearing me shout for help. I wished to state that I had not seen the group before near to my office area where I was assaulted. Nothing was taken away from me during the assault. I would not be able to recognize the assailant as the incident had happened too fast. This is the first time such an incident had happened to me and I am very sure that four of them from the group had assaulted me. I had suffered slight swelling on the right side of my head, left arm, right shoulder and right shin area. I had not seek any medical attention. After the assault about 10-15mins, I called for the Police at 999 and was advised to lodge a Police Report at the nearest Police station. That’s all.”

The police officer who attended to me typed this up and for the record, I wish to state here that I
1) can’t be sure there were no girls among them.

2) am also not all that sure they aren’t any younger than 18

3) didn’t just swing the tripod. I flung it at them and hit whoever was in front of me on the head, arms and back a couple of times, which hopefully is hurting right now. But I didn’t really describe all that much to the police, only that I retaliated with my tripod.

4) am beginning to think that the so-called “long hard object” could very well be a skateboard.

5) got hit on the head only once (which resulted in the bump) though he did take aim a number of times

6) was also kicked repeatedly apart from the fisting and attempts to hit me on the head by this guy wearing high cut doc martens.

7) can still vaguely remember one or two faces, but during the recording, the officer asked if I was very sure I can recognize all of them, which after a moment’s thought I didn’t think I cld, so I replied I wasn’t confident about identifying them all accurately.

8) can’t even really be sure that 4 of them from the group assaulted me. Could possibly be only 3. To be honest, the words “very sure” scares me a ‘lil.

9) called Matt first before I called the police. I don’t really know why either, but he just felt like the right person to talk to. And it seemed he has an idea who these trouble-makers were and have seen them around. So maybe I’ll get a chance to snap their mugs after all.

Trying to make sense of what happened right after the punks made a dash for it was weird, almost awkward in fact. I didn’t know how I shd be reacting or what I ought to be feeling. I wasn’t even sure if I can say I was relieved ‘cos the whole time, it did feel like I was watching from the outside the attack unfolding. It was only 5 minutes of what would otherwise hv been a normal enough day, 5 minutes from the rest of the time where business went on as usual, but the drama in these 5 mins isn’t quite something one can walk over once it has come to past. The whole incident was disturbing enough yet it didn’t leave much of a dent for me to gripped tightly onto in my head. And so I simply continued normally towards my intended destination as if nothing had happened, though a couple did stop me at the bus stop to enquire what I was shouting for help for.

It’s hard to say for certain if the punks were trying to rob me, which was initially what I thought. But seeing that none of them even gave much of an attempt to lay their hands on my bag and wallet, my best guess now is that they just wanted some thrill. Matt tells me there’s this ongoing fad in England called ‘Happy Slapping’, where kids go ard beating ppl up randomly, so quite possibly, this cld be it. That said however, I won’t completely rule robbery out as their motive as I had this sense when they were trying for my head that they hv every intention to knock me out, then take my stuff. But it was just too bad I didn’t cave in half as fast as they’d expected, which made them momentarily unsure of what next to do.

These punks are new to this I can tell.